Or if that were impossible he would like to be alone at home, on the terrace⁠—without either Lebedeff or his children, or anyone else about him, and to lie there and think⁠—a day and night and another day again! He thought of the mountains⁠—and especially of a certain spot which he used to frequent, whence he would look down upon the distant valleys and fields, and see the waterfall, far off, like a little silver thread, and the old ruined castle in the distance. Oh! how he longed to be there now⁠—alone with his thoughts⁠—to think of one thing all his life⁠—one thing! A thousand years would not be too much time! And let everyone here forget him⁠—forget him utterly! How much better it would have been if they had never known him⁠—if all this could but prove to be a dream. Perhaps it was a dream!

Now and then he looked at Aglaya for five minutes at a time, without taking his eyes off her face; but his expression was very strange; he would gaze at her as though she were an object a couple of miles distant, or as though he were looking at her portrait and not at herself at all.