I hardly ever see a roof Which doesn’t shout, “Walk me, you goof!” I hardly ever pass a tree But that it barks, “You can’t climb me!” And I am warned by every wall, “Lay off me, Lardner, lest you fall!”
So what with always giving proof That I’m a H‑ll cat on a roof, And climbing every wall and tree To show they ain’t too tough for me, I fear that I’m inclined to shirk What (laughingly) I call my work.