Amalia’s Secret

don’t think I did, still, it’s possible; we’re in a bad way, our whole world is in ruins, and once we begin to complain we’re carried further than we realise. You’re quite right, there’s a big difference now between us and Frieda, and it’s a good thing to emphasise it once in a while. Three years ago we were respectable girls and Frieda an outcast, a servant in the Bridge Inn, we used to walk past her without looking at her, I admit we were too arrogant, but that’s how we were brought up. But that evening in the Herrenhof probably enlightened you about our respective positions today. Frieda with the whip in her hand, and I among the crowd of servants. But it’s worse even than that! Frieda may despise us, her position entitles her to do so, actual circumstances compel it. But who is there who doesn’t despise us? Whoever decides to despise us will find himself in good company. Do you know Frieda’s successor? Pepi, she’s called. I met her for the first time the night before last, she used to be a chamber maid. She certainly outdoes Frieda in her contempt for me. She saw me through the window as I was coming for beer, and ran to the door and locked it, so that I had to beg and pray for a long time and promise her the ribbon from my hair before she would let me in. But when I gave it to her she threw it into a corner. Well, I can’t help it if she despises me, I’m partly dependent on her goodwill, and she’s the barmaid in the Herrenhof. Only for the time being, it’s true, for she certainly hasn’t the qualities needed for permanent employment there. One only has to overhear how the landlord speaks to Pepi and compare it with his tone to Frieda. But that doesn’t hinder Pepi from despising even Amalia, Amalia, whose glance alone would be enough to drive Pepi with all her plaits and ribbons out of the room much faster than her own fat legs would ever carry her. I had to listen again yesterday to her infuriating slanders against Amalia until the customers took my part at last, although only in the kind of way you have seen already.” “How touchy you are,” said K. “I only put Frieda in her right place, but I had no intention of belittling you, as you seem to think. Your family has a special interest for me, I have never denied it; but how this interest could give me