Olga’s Plans

father was still able to go to the Herrenhof with me, he slept somewhere in the taproom, and in that way waited for the news that I would bring in the morning. There wasn’t much to bring. We’ve never found the messenger to this day, he must be still with Sortini who values him very highly, and he must have followed Sortini when Sortini retired to a more remote bureau. Most of the servants haven’t seen him since we saw him last ourselves, and when one or other claims to have seen him it’s probably a mistake. So my plan might have actually failed, and yet it hasn’t failed completely, it’s true we haven’t found the messenger, and going to the Herrenhof and spending the night there⁠—perhaps his pity for me, too, any pity that he’s still capable of⁠—has unfortunately ruined my father, and for two years now he has been in the state you’ve seen him in, and yet things are perhaps better with him than with my mother, for we’re waiting daily for her death; it has only been put off thanks to Amalia’s superhuman efforts. But what I’ve achieved in the Herrenhof is a certain connection with the Castle; don’t despise me when I say that I don’t repent what I’ve done. What conceivable sort of a connection with the Castle can this be, you’ll no doubt be thinking; and you’re right, it’s not much of a connection. I know a great many of the servants now, of course, almost all the gentlemen’s servants who have come to the village during the last two years, and if I should ever get into the Castle I shan’t be a stranger there. Of course they’re servants only in the village, in the Castle they’re quite different, and probably wouldn’t know me or anybody else there that they’ve had dealings with in the village, that’s quite certain, even if they have sworn a hundred times in the stall that they would be delighted to see me again in the Castle. Besides I’ve already had experience of how little all these promises are worth. But still that’s not the really important thing. It isn’t only through the servants themselves that I have a connection with the Castle, for apart from that I hope and trust that what I’m doing is being noticed by someone up there⁠—and the management of the staff of servants is really an extremely important and laborious official function⁠—and that finally whoever is