“Sorry, Major,” I say in embarrassment, “I didn’t notice you.”

“Don’t you know how to speak properly?” he roars.

I would like to hit him in the face, but control myself, for my leave depends on it. I click my heels and say: “I did not see you, Herr Major.”

“Then keep your eyes open,” he snorts. “What is your name?” I give it.

His fat red face is furious. “What regiment?”

I give him full particulars. Even yet he has not had enough. “Where are you quartered?”

But I have had more than enough and say: “Between Langemark and Bixschoote.”

“Eh?” he asks, a bit stupefied.