“As I was sayin’ about dogs. I was battering the privates, see? Private houses. A woman had just slipped me a dime an’ was standin’ in the front door watchin’ to see that I got off the premises. I’m about halfway to the gate when I heard a dog snarlin’, an’ comin’ up behind me. I’m D.D. , see, an’ don’t want to round on the damn dog an’ give myself a bawl-out in front of the woman, so I stand my ground figgerin’ she’ll stop him. The next thing I know he’s got half my pants leg ripped off an’ a chunk out of one of my shins. Anyway, I run him under the house. The woman took me in an’ fixed me up with arnica an’ a bandage. Then she gets me a good suit of her old man’s clothes, gives me two dollars, and holds the dog under the house till I get out the front gate. That’s dogs for you,” he finished, “an’ women.”

I had a question, but the other bum asked it for me. “What do you do if you bump into a natural dummy when you’re D.D. ing?”