“Well, then, you can do something for us⁠—make the newspapers and magazines quit calling us Sammies. We’ve never done anything to deserve a name like that.”

“What’s the matter with it?” we inquired.

“Everything!” said the captain. “It doesn’t fit, it sounds childish, and we just naturally hate it.”

We asked him whether there was an acceptable substitute.

“I don’t know of any,” he said. “In due time we’ll wish one on ourselves that will have pep and sound real. Meanwhile call us Julias, Howards⁠—anything you like, except Sammies.”

We promised to do our best for him, and he was grateful enough to invite us to his mess for lunch.