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nydus/Gullible’s TravelsPublic

An exasperated Chicago husband and his status-hungry wife attempt to climb the social ladder in six comic misadventures.

Page 49 of 208
Table of Contents

Three Kings and a Pair

But the curtain was supposed to go up at eight-ten, and it wasn’t only about that time when we got there, so they was over half a hour to kill before the show begin. I looked in my program and seen the real translation o’ the title. The Love o’ Three Kings , it says, and no “of God” to it. I’d of knew anyway, when I’d read the plot, that He didn’t have nothin’ to do with it.

I listened a w’ile to Bishop and Bess.

“And you’ve saw all the op’ras?” she ast him.

“Most o’ them,” he says.

“How grand!” says Bessie. “I wisht I could see a lot o’ them.”

“Well,” he says, “you’re goin’ to be here for some time.”

“Oh, Mr. Bishop, I don’t want you throwin’ all your money away on me,” she says.

“I don’t call it throwin’ money away,” says Bishop.

“I wouldn’t neither,” I says. “I’d say Bishop was muscle-bound.”

They didn’t pay no attention to me.

“What ones would you like to see?” he ast her.

“What are your favorights?” says Bess.

“Oh,” says Bishop, “I’ve saw them all so many times that it don’t really make no difference to me. Sometimes they give two the same night, two short ones, and then you ain’t so liable to get bored.”

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