“ ‘Well, I congratulate you on seeing. But I only see that you behave like a coquette. … You always find pleasure in all kinds of vileness, but to me it is terrible!’
“ ‘Oh, well, if you are going to scold like a cabman I’ll go away.’
“ ‘Go, but remember that if you don’t value the family honour, I value not you (devil take you) but the honour of the family!’
“ ‘But what is the matter? What?’
“ ‘Go away, for God’s sake be off!’
“Whether she pretended not to understand what it was about or really did not understand, at any rate she took offence, grew angry, and did not go away but stood in the middle of the room.
“ ‘You have really become impossible,’ she began. ‘You have a character that even an angel could not put up with.’ And as usual trying to sting me as painfully as possible, she reminded me of my conduct to my sister (an incident when, being exasperated, I said rude things to my sister); she knew I was distressed about it and she stung me just on that spot. ‘After that, nothing from you will surprise me,’ she said.
“ ‘Yes! Insult me, humiliate me, disgrace me, and then put the blame on me,’ I said to myself, and suddenly I was seized by such terrible rage as I had never before experienced.
“For the first time I wished to give physical expression to that rage. I jumped up and went towards her; but just as I jumped up I remembered becoming conscious of my rage and asking myself: ‘Is it right to give way to this feeling?’ and at once I answered that it was right, that it would frighten her, and instead of restraining my fury, I immediately began inflaming it still further, and was glad it burnt yet more fiercely within me.