“ ‘Yes, look and admire what you have done,’ she said looking towards the door, and she sobbed. In the doorway stood her sister with the children. ‘Yes, see what you have done.’
“I looked at the children and at her bruised and disfigured face, and for the first time I forgot myself, my rights, my pride, and for the first time saw a human being in her. And so insignificant did all that had offended me, all my jealousy, appear, and so important what I had done, that I wished to fall with my face to her hand, and say: ‘Forgive me,’ but dared not do so.
“She lay silent with her eyes closed, evidently too weak to say more. Then her disfigured face trembled and puckered. She pushed me feebly away.
“ ‘Why did it all happen? Why?’
“ ‘Forgive me,’ I said.
“ ‘Forgive! That’s all rubbish! … only not to die! …’ she cried, raising herself, and her glittering eyes were bent on me. ‘Yes, you have had your way! … I hate you! Ah! Ah!’ she cried, evidently already in delirium and frightened at something. ‘Shoot! I’m not afraid! … Only kill everyone … ! He has gone … ! Gone … !’
“After that the delirium continued all the time. She did not recognize anyone. She died towards noon that same day. Before that they had taken me to the police station and from there to prison. There, during the eleven months I remained awaiting trial, I examined myself and my past, and understood it. I began to understand it on the third day: on the third day they took me there …”
He was going on but, unable to repress his sobs, he stopped. When he recovered himself he continued:
“I only began to understand when I saw her in her coffin …”