the daily habit of composing better lines . Those of ‘Oppodeldoc’ will not scan . ‘Oppodeldoc’ should learn to count . But why he should have conceived the idea that we , (of all others, we !) would disgrace our pages with his ineffable nonsense, is utterly beyond comprehension. Why, the absurd twattle is scarcely good enough for the Hum-Drum , the Rowdy-Dow , the Goosetherumfoodle —things that are in the practice of publishing ‘Mother Goose’s Melodies’ as original lyrics. And ‘Oppodeldoc’ (whoever he is) has even the assurance to demand pay for this drivel. Does ‘Oppodeldoc’ (whoever he is) know—is he aware that we could not be paid to insert it?”
As I perused this I felt myself growing gradually smaller and smaller, and when I came to the point at which the editor sneered at the poem as “verses” there was little more than an ounce of me left. As for “Oppodeldoc,” I began to experience compassion for the poor fellow. But the Goosetherumfoodle showed, if possible, less mercy than the Lollipop . It was the Goosetherumfoodle that said:
“A wretched poetaster, who signs himself ‘Oppodeldoc,’ is silly enough to fancy that we will print and pay for a medley of incoherent and ungrammatical bombast which he has transmitted to us, and which commences with the following most intelligible line: “We say, ‘most intelligible .’ ‘Oppodeldoc’ (whoever he is) will be kind enough to tell us, perhaps, how ‘ hail ’ can be ‘ holy light ’ We always regarded it as frozen rain . Will he inform us, also, how frozen rain can be, at one and the same time, both ‘holy light,’ (whatever that is) and an ‘offspring?’—which latter term (if we understand anything about English) is only employed, with propriety,