That fresh fairy, Tippins, all but screams at sight of her false swain. She summons the deserter to her with her fan; but the deserter, predetermined not to come, talks Britain with Podsnap. Podsnap always talks Britain, and talks as if he were a sort of private watchman employed, in the British interests, against the rest of the world. “We know what Russia means, sir,” says Podsnap; “we know what France wants; we see what America is up to; but we know what England is. That’s enough for us.”

However, when dinner is served, and Lightwood drops into his old place over against Lady Tippins, she can be fended off no longer. “Long banished Robinson Crusoe,” says the charmer, exchanging salutations, “how did you leave the island?”

“Thank you,” says Lightwood. “It made no complaint of being in pain anywhere.”

“Say, how did you leave the savages?” asks Lady Tippins.