I passed by an auditorium (I do not recall its number). Inside, the benches were stacked along the walls. In the middle, tables covered with snow-white glass sheets, with pink stains of sunny blood on the white.⁠ ⁠… There was foreshadowed in all that some unknown and therefore alarming tomorrow. It is unnatural for a thinking and seeing human being to live among irregularities, unknowns, X ’s. If suddenly your eyes were covered with a bandage and you were let go to feel around, to stumble, ever aware that somewhere very close to you there is the borderline, one step only and nothing but a compressed, smothered piece of flesh will be left of you.⁠ ⁠… I now feel somewhat like that.

… And what if without waiting for anything I should⁠ ⁠… just head down.⁠ ⁠… Would it not be the only right thing to do? To disentangle everything at once?