‘Roast weal,’ says the patient. ‘Wot’s the last thing you dewoured?’ says the doctor. ‘Crumpets,’ says the patient. ‘That’s it!’ says the doctor. ‘I’ll send you a box of pills directly, and don’t you never take no more of ’em,’ he says. ‘No more o’ wot?’ says the patient⁠—‘pills?’ ‘No; crumpets,’ says the doctor. ‘Wy?’ says the patient, starting up in bed; ‘I’ve eat four crumpets, ev’ry night for fifteen year, on principle.’ ‘Well, then, you’d better leave ’em off, on principle,’ says the doctor. ‘Crumpets is