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nydus/The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, GentlemanPublic
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II

When my father had danced his white bear backwards and forwards through half a dozen pages, he closed the book for good an’ all,⁠—and in a kind of triumph redelivered it into Trim’s hand, with a nod to lay it upon the ’scrutoire, where he found it.⁠⸺⁠ Tristram , said he, shall be made to conjugate every word in the dictionary, backwards and forwards the same way;⁠⸺⁠every word, Yorick , by this means, you see, is converted into a thesis or an hypothesis;⁠—every thesis and hypothesis have an offspring of propositions;⁠—and each proposition has its own consequences and conclusions; every one of which leads the mind on again, into fresh tracks of enquiries and doubtings.⁠⸺⁠The force of this engine, added my father, is incredible in opening a child’s head.⁠⸺’Tis enough, brother Shandy , cried my uncle Toby , to burst it into a thousand splinters.⁠⸺⁠

I presume, said Yorick , smiling,⁠—it must be owing to this,⁠⸺(for let logicians say what they will, it is not to be accounted for sufficiently from the bare use of the ten predicaments)⁠⸺⁠That the famous Vincent Quirino , amongst the many other astonishing feats of his childhood, of which the Cardinal Bembo has given the world so exact a story,⁠—should be able to paste up in the public schools at Rome , so early as in the eighth year of his age, no less than four thousand five hundred and fifty different theses, upon the most abstruse points of the most abstruse theology;⁠—and to defend and maintain them in such sort, as to cramp and dumbfound his opponents.⁠⸺⁠What is that, cried my father, to what is told us of Alphonsus Tostatus , who, almost in his nurse’s arms, learned all the sciences and liberal arts without being taught any one of them?⁠⸺⁠What shall we say of the great Piereskius? ⁠—That’s the very man, cried my uncle Toby , I once told you of, brother Shandy , who walked a matter of five hundred miles, reckoning from Paris to Shevling ,

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