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nydus/The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, GentlemanPublic

A man describes his birth and upbringing through the adventures of his family.

Page 355 of 810
Table of Contents

XIII

and opinions of it to take up as much description⁠—And for what reason should they be cut short? as at this rate I should just live 364 times faster than I should write⁠—It must follow, an’ please your worships, that the more I write, the more I shall have to write⁠—and consequently, the more your worships read, the more your worships will have to read.

Will this be good for your worships’ eyes?

It will do well for mine; and, was it not that my Opinions will be the death of me, I perceive I shall lead a fine life of it out of this selfsame life of mine; or, in other words, shall lead a couple of fine lives together.

As for the proposal of twelve volumes a year, or a volume a month, it no way alters my prospect⁠—write as I will, and rush as I may into the middle of things, as Horace advises⁠—I shall never overtake myself whipp’d and driven to the last pinch; at the worst I shall have one day the start of my pen⁠—and one day is enough for two volumes⁠⸺⁠and two volumes will be enough for one year.⁠—

Heaven prosper the manufacturers of paper under this propitious reign, which is now opened to us⁠⸺⁠as I trust its providence will prosper everything else in it that is taken in hand.⁠⸺⁠

As for the propagation of Geese⁠—I give myself no concern⁠—Nature is all bountiful⁠—I shall never want tools to work with.

—So then, friend! you have got my father and my uncle Toby off the stairs, and seen them to bed?⁠⸻And how did you manage it?⁠⸺⁠You dropp’d a curtain at the stair-foot⁠—I thought you had no other way for it⁠⸻Here’s a crown for your trouble.

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