.⸺Though the learned, continued he, taking no notice of my uncle Toby’s remark, but turning to Yorick ,—are greatly divided still who Ilus was;—some say Saturn ;—some the Supreme Being;—others, no more than a brigadier general under Pharaoh-neco .⸺Let him be who he will, said my uncle Toby , I know not by what article of war he could justify it.
The controvertists, answered my father, assign two-and-twenty different reasons for it:—others, indeed, who have drawn their pens on the opposite side of the question, have shown the world the futility of the greatest part of them.—But then again, our best polemic divines—I wish there was not a polemic divine, said Yorick , in the kingdom;—one ounce of practical divinity—is worth a painted shipload of all their reverences have imported these fifty years.—Pray, Mr. Yorick , quoth my uncle Toby ,—do tell me what a polemic divine is?⸺The best description, captain Shandy , I have ever read, is of a couple of ’em, replied Yorick , in the account of the battle fought single hands betwixt Gymnast and captain Tripet ; which I have in my pocket.⸺I beg I may hear it, quoth my uncle Toby earnestly.—You shall, said Yorick .—And as the corporal is waiting for me at the door,—and I know the description of a battle will do the poor fellow more good than his supper,—I beg, brother, you’ll give him leave to come in.—With all my soul, said my father.⸺ Trim came in, erect and happy as an emperor; and having shut the door, Yorick took a book from his right-hand coat-pocket, and read, or pretended to read, as follows.