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nydus/The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, GentlemanPublic

A man describes his birth and upbringing through the adventures of his family.

Page 808 of 810
Table of Contents

XXXIII

pieces⁠⸺⁠

⸺⁠When Obadiah broke into the middle of the room with a complaint, which cried out for an immediate hearing.

The case was this:

My father, whether by ancient custom of the manor, or as impropriator of the great tythes, was obliged to keep a Bull for the service of the Parish, and Obadiah had led his cow upon a pop-visit to him one day or other the preceding summer⁠⸺⁠I say, one day or other⁠—because as chance would have it, it was the day on which he was married to my father’s housemaid⁠⸺⁠so one was a reckoning to the other. Therefore when Obadiah’s wife was brought to bed⁠— Obadiah thanked God⁠⸺⁠

⸺⁠Now, said Obadiah , I shall have a calf: so Obadiah went daily to visit his cow.

She’ll calve on Monday ⁠—on Tuesday ⁠—on Wednesday at the farthest⁠⸺⁠

The cow did not calve⁠⸺⁠no⁠—she’ll not calve till next week⁠⸺⁠the cow put it off terribly⁠⸺⁠till at the end of the sixth week Obadiah’s suspicions (like a good man’s) fell upon the Bull.

Now the parish being very large, my father’s Bull, to speak the truth of him, was no way equal to the department; he had, however, got himself, somehow or other, thrust into employment⁠—and as he went through the business with a grave face, my father had a high opinion of him.

⸺⁠Most of the townsmen, an’ please your worship, quoth Obadiah , believe that ’tis all the Bull’s fault⁠⸺⁠

⸺⁠But may not a cow be barren? replied my father, turning to Doctor Slop .

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