It was promptly settled between us that he and I were to be great friends forever, and he would say “our friendship” as though he were speaking of some important and delightful thing which had an existence independent of ourselves, and which he soon called⁠—not counting his love for his mistress⁠—the great joy of his life. These words made me rather uncomfortable and I was at a loss for an answer, for I did not feel when I was with him and talked to him⁠—and no doubt it would have been the same with everyone else⁠—any of that happiness which it was, on the other hand, possible for me to experience when I was by myself. For alone, at times, I felt surging from the depths of my being one or other of those impressions which gave me a delicious sense of comfort. But as soon as I was with someone else, when I began to talk to a friend, my mind at once “turned about,” it was towards the listener and not myself that it directed its thoughts, and when they followed this outward course they brought me no pleasure.